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Laughter Brings People Together

Tips on how to add humour to create a positive impact

Creating a positive impact

Researchers describe humour as a sudden resolution of a  cognitive incongruity. Using humour makes one appear more clever, engaging, confident and charismatic. It is proven to make one more persuasive. Smart business people are actively looking at ways to make humour work for them professionally and profitably.

There is, however, one stumbling block that deters many people from increasing their use of humour. Whenever I suggest it, the most common response is: "I'm just not funny!"

Some people think that the only way they can add humour is by saying something original and witty. They compare themselves to the cleverest writers and comedians and, of course, they come up short. A colleague described it best recently when she said, "I see myself as a fun person. I just don't see myself as a funny person." Like most people, she was willing to participate in the fun; but she lacked the confidence to initiate the fun.

Approach

Expecting ourselves to add humour this way is unrealistic. It is also unnecessary. Humour is created more by your intent and approach than clever one-liners. For example:

  1. You look for reasons to build others up - perhaps even exaggerating their achievements. "I heard about your win at golf this weekend. Can I have your desk when you leave to turn professional?"

  2. You look for ways to give them a compliment -"ln a store in Australia if you saw one hundred customers in a day it would be a record. In Singapore, you'd call that a quiet day!"

  3. You look for ways to make the other person more comfortable - Even help them to save face. "Don't worry (about getting my name wrong, I have trouble getting it right myself sometimes!"

Intent

Would you use more humour if you knew you couldn't fail? Of course, you would! Yet, many of us make the mistake of using the wrong measure of success. It should all be based on your intent.

  1. Wrong intent - You want to add humour to show them how clever you are. Your expectation is that they will laugh; so, if they don't, you have failed.

  2. Right intent -  You want to add humour to make the communication more pleasant and interesting for the other person. This way, even if they do not laugh out loud, you will have created a more positive atmosphere.

Adding humour does not require you to say or do something funny. Just look for opportunities to make others comfortable, uplift them with a compliment or relieve their embarrassment and the humour will happen. You might not get a 'belly-laugh', but you'll certainly get a smile!

 

The article is contributed by Mr Kevin Ryan, an Associate Trainer at the Management Development & Consultancy, MDIS’ Corporate Training Arm.